There is really not much that causes me to feel more beautiful than His Love, unless it is sharing His Love with others. As you read this, I will have just had the honor of spending the last few days guiding some beautiful women from Fairchild AFB in Spokane into the beauty of knowing they are Beloved Daughters of the King.
The thing is, I have to constantly remind myself of this beautiful truth, that I am a Beloved Daughter of the King.
I remind myself that I haven’t always felt beautiful or loved. As a child, I was the scrawny, stringy haired daughter of Carl and Betty. Not ugly, but certainly not beautiful. I’m fairly certain I was loved, but I don’t know that my not-ugly-but-not-beautiful soul knew it was there for me.
As a teen, I had gone from scrawny to still-small-but-strong with long brunette hair that my ebony skinned basketball teammates loved to braid. And love, oh love, you felt incredibly elusive to me during those years. What I did for what I thought was love…I am very certain was not love at all.
As an adult, I suppose I outgrew the not-ugly-but-not-beautiful stage as I began to get second glances and outright propositions from men. Not an entirely positive position to find myself in as a young married momma of two. And love, well I’m fairly certain my hardened heart had closed itself off to the possibility of real love.
Then I remind myself that I have journeyed through much pain and sorrow to become the Beautiful and Loved woman I am today.
The wrinkles on my face not only remind me of that pain and sorrow but also of how much I love to laugh.
The short grey hair that has mostly replaced the long brunette locks of my youth remind me of the wisdom and strength God has led me to and through.
The extra pounds and inches that have crept onto my still smallish frame remind me of how I LOVE to eat and gather around a beautifully set table laden with deliciousness. And I am certain food always tastes better when I am surrounded by those I love and who love me.
But I am very certain that what has become the most beautiful of all of me is my heart. It has been torn…by me and choices I’ve made…by others ~those I have loved, those I have hated, those who really didn’t give a damn. But what has brought true beauty to this torn heart of mine is that it has been stitched together with fibers of His Grace and Mercy. Strangely, I’m not afraid of seeing my scars or even showing them to others ~ for they are what remind me the most that He loved me enough to redeem me, to restore me, to call me Beautiful.
So this past weekend I have been sharing my scars with the lovely women I’ve been with and I am most certain that I felt most beautiful while baring my broken beauty, my redeemed heart, my restored soul.
Ann Wilson is the cofounder of Marriages Restored (www.marriagesrestored.com) with her husband, Ben. Their joint passion for seeing souls and marriages restored has been a journey that began with the restoration of their own souls and their own marriage. Their hope is to offer hope to others who find themselves in hopeless situations.
Ann currently resides in Longmont, Colorado with her husband in a tiny house with a sliver of a view of the Rocky Mountains from her porch swing. She is delighted to be only 45 minutes away from her new granddaughter that has stolen her heart.
Ann loves to laugh, she loves to cook and eat, she loves her husband, she loves the sacredness of tears, she loves the joy of new life, she loves the Missouri Tigers, she loves to witness growth in others and herself, she loves Jesus, she loves her grown children, she loves her granddaughter, she loves the wonder of creativity, she loves the warmth of Grace, she loves that God redeems even her.