Dictionary.com defines beauty as, “the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind arising from sensory manifestations.” So many things in our world resonate with this definition, but I certainly don’t think of myself when I read this definition. Cascading waterfalls against a back drop of glossy, jagged boulder rocks; lush green meadows sparkled with colorful wildflowers; white, fluffy, and powdery snowflakes floating in the air; towering, thick, and abrasive trees with vibrant color-changing leaves; and soaring mountains providing spectacular views are just some of the countless examples of God’s beauty in our life. One might find it more difficult to find it among oneself, as so many of us are naturally self-critics constantly finding our flaws behaviorally as well as physically. Although, I am entranced by others’ beauty all too often, there have been two times in my life when I have felt undeniably gorgeous inside and out and the glow from these memories always stays with me.
The first time occurred on my husband’s 28th birthday. Soaked in sweat, exhausted from pain, I lifted my head to see for the first time the magnificent being that had grown inside of me for that past nine months. He was slimy and wrinkly with a coned shaped head, but he was perfect. And I was responsible for him. I had created this flawless and beautiful little boy. I had endured 13 hours of sheer agonizing pain without an epidural; my first selfless act of many for sweet Miles. Looking into his eyes I felt such joy, pride, and beauty. From that moment on I have felt the true beauty of what it is to be a mother and how it feels to create someone so beautiful!
The second time occurred around 2 years later on January 10th when my second son, Crosby, was born. More prepared for the battle of labor and more prepared to care for an infant, I still could not have imagined the bliss that once again would soon enfold me. The elation I felt when Crosby was first set on my chest, and I looked down at him, is indescribable. Once again I experienced overwhelming happiness and felt truly beautiful for this baby was a reflection of me.
I believe that true beauty lies within, but it is that beauty that acknowledges our outer beauty, and it is that beauty that is responsible for our accomplishments. I am a mother and I am beautiful!
My name is Kati Sue Rafacz. I grew up in a family of seven with two older sisters, a twin sister, and a younger brother. My favorite pastime was playing Barbies with my sisters. Other favorites include playing with dolls, playing statues, playing whiffle ball in the backyard, and playing in Gus Macker tournaments. I participated in varsity basketball, cross-country, track and field, and volleyball in high school. I graduated from Michigan State University with a degree in English. I received my Master’s degree from Middle Tennessee State University in Library Science. I taught eighth grade English for six years and am currently a librarian at an elementary school. I live with my 130 pound Newfoundland dog, my husband (also my high school sweetheart) and my two baby boys (Miles and Crosby) in middle Tennessee.