(but I’m not throwing a pity party or anything)
Here are the thoughts I have on a typical day:
– Did that 15-year-old seriously just whistle at me?
– Good, I now have confirmation that it isn’t just adult men, but ALL males who possess the physical inability to WHISPER
– Oh really? Your teacher allows you to __________ (use your cell phone, eat, etc) in class? That’s interesting, because I have SPECIFIC notes from YOUR TEACHER saying the exact opposite. (Okay, I usually say this one out loud)
– How interesting that all 26 students in this class have to use the bathroom this hour
– Really, Jack, do you think I didn’t notice that you took FORTY-FIVE minutes to use the restroom?
– Wow, high schoolers really aren’t shy about asking your age
– I can’t believe how much better behaved East Jordan students are than Charlevoix or Petoskey
– I may just be a sub, but I do in fact notice that you’re cheating on your quiz when your review sheet is face up right under your desk and you’re staring at it the whole time
– I’m not sure where the humor is in asking your substitute teacher, 10+ years your senior, for her phone number or out to dinner
– Are they seriously complaining about watching Thirteen Days- a hollywoodized movie about the Cuban Missile Crisis? This movie’s great! (or Mr. Smith Goes to Washington- also a great movie)
– Oh good, the teacher left instructions for 60 minutes of free time for 35 sixth grade pre-adolescents. Thank you for making my day as difficult as possible
– Thanks for the seating chart, but since I don’t know any of the students names, and since students love to lie to subs, I really can’t enforce it
– Aw, how nice of this teacher to offer his or her personal tea or snacks to me
– Just once, couldn’t you leave lesson plans involving the SmartBoard?! I love that thing
So, there you have it. My unedited thoughts.
Despite all of the above, however, I will say that I generally enjoy working with the students and have a blast seeing my old teachers (old as in previous, not as in age). Further, I am quite happy to have work at all, so I especially appreciate when they request me as their sub.
It can just be a little much when a substitute, by definition (at least to students), is someone to take advantage of.