Queen Elizabeth I once said, “I do not want a husband who honours me as a queen, if he does not love me as a woman.”

I realize she never married, and those who contend that marriage is best and singleness is a lonely, second rate existence may argue that her pride led to such a lonely life. I don’t want to get into that debate of whether it’s better to be married or be single. Rather, I want to draw attention to the fact that Queen Elizabeth I knew that she had something worth loving, she had value. Those who criticize her may not remember that she was in an impossible position of having to distinguish between who was after her heart and who was after her crown.

Queen Elizabeth I knew that there was something of beauty in her, something that deserved to be loved. I am saddened so often by seeing women who give up dreams, self, and standards for men who do not respect or love them simply because they do not realize that they are worth more.

It can be a chronic struggle to own what is good in ourselves as women, but we must learn to do so.

When I am unaware of my talents, I am more likely to remain silent, less likely to question authority, and more susceptible to being taken advantage of- all because I refuse to own what is good in me. When I have a more accurate perception of what makes me unique, what makes me Krista Swenor, I am more likely to contribute constructively to conversation, less likely to be trampled on, and more receptive of love from others.

It’s not a matter of pride. It’s not a matter of conceit.

It’s a matter of self-respect and honouring what’s beautiful in me, in order to understand what’s genuine and beautiful from and in others.

Tomorrow’s Women’s History Month Trivia. Who said: “I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship”?


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